It's time for a change.

Here's the background stoty:

I've had a gym membership since January 2008. You may ask, "When was the last time you used it?" I'll be honest. The last time I used it was the first week of February... 2008. Now, now, before you laugh, let me explain. It wasn't for lack of wanting to go or getting lazy- in fact, I LOVED working out. It made me feel good. Overall, I felt less tired and lethargic, and it gave me a chance to take out my aggression on something, thus reducing my stress. The reason I stopped was because of painful medical conditions (endometriosis, adenomyosis, and interstitial cystitis) that prevented me from pretty much doing anything physical. I couldn't even go walk around the mall for an hour without ending up doubled over in pain and having residual pain for the next few days.

This pain lasted until the summer of 2009, when, through the miracle of IVF, I got pregnant. Because of the shift in hormones, the endometriosis calmed down. I had no pain. In fact, I felt better than I had in the last four years combined, and felt like I could run a marathon (even though I am not built for running in the LEAST.) During my whole pregnancy, I took it easy. By taking it easy, I don't mean that I was sedentary. I mean that I did no high-impact exercise- I walked, I did housework, etc. Even though I wanted to really work out, I was scared to death that somehow something would happen to the baby. Since I had waited so long and gone through so much to finally get pregnant, I wasn't willing to even chance it. I had NO complications during my pregnancy at all.

On February 12, 2010, I delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy, who is the joy of my life. I couldn't wait until my 6 week OBGYN appointment, where I figured she would clear me to get back in the gym while I was still pain-free, since there's no knowing if or when the endometriosis pain will come back. However, I had some major setbacks that I'm still dealing with. Two days after I got home from the hospital where I delivered, I landed in ICU at a different hospital for a week. My OB sent me to the ER there because I had pounding in my head that wouldn't go away (the hospital I delivered at sent me home with it, although I kept telling them there was no change in pain even while they were feeding me percocet). Because of shoddy anesthesia care and a messed up epidural at the hospital I delivered at, I ended up with a subdural hematoma (bleeding on the brain). For the first 3 weeks of my son's life I was in bed. I could barely even sit up without the pounding in my head increasing and becoming unbearable, let alone stand up. I dreaded having to get up to use the bathroom- every time I stood up, it felt like the back of my skull was being blown off and it sounded like I had helicopters in my head. Over the next couple weeks, the pounding subsided, to be replaced by pressure and a really nasty metallic kind of feeling in my skull. The headache was still there, but at least I could get up and move. It's now been 6.5 weeks since I delivered, and there's still blood and spinal fluid on my brain. I still get headaches and once in a while I get the pressure/metallic feeling. The neurosurgeon still won't even let me drive, let alone work out. I had another CT scan yesterday, so we'll see what that reveals.

On top of the brain issue, my gallbladder is shot and I need to have it removed ASAP. I had a 48-hour gallbladder attack after I delivered, but didn't know that's what it was (I had no idea I had gallbladder problems). I chalked the pain up to a pulled muscle in my back, since that's where I was feeling it the most, and the doctors just took my word for it, even though I described the symptoms I was having. But I guess it's a good thing they didn't diagnose me properly, because they would have operated without knowing about the bleeding on the brain and it could have been disastrous. I was scheduled to have my gallbladder out a week and a half ago, but the neurosurgeon doesn't want me to risk it. He'll reevaluate that decision when he gets the images from yesterday's CT scan. I can barely eat anything- anything with any normal amount of fat triggers excruciating gallbladder attacks that last 4+ hours, and there's nothing I can do to releive the pain.

So that's where I am now. Waiting for clearance to have my gallbladder out. HOPEFULLY I can get into the gym after I recover from the surgery.